Eyes without a face

Can you tell if I am happy? sad?
How about now?

Are you sure you guessed correctly?

My eyes

1980’s Lisa

They used to be young and vibrant. My husband Scott even wrote a poem about my blue eyes before we were engaged.

And now? Well – my eyes show my age and the work, trauma and grief I have endured.

My eyes can’t hide my truth.

These last weeks I can’t hide the sadness in my eyes. Crying make my eyelids so puffy. The mask hides my bags partially but you don’t have to be close up to me to see how bad I look. It is convenient to not have to wear makeup with a mask covering up most of your face. Why bother putting eyeliner on- it can’t fix these fifty something year old eyes.

I wish my patients could see my full face. See my smile. I would be happier if the smile that I DO get when I see my patients was apparent to them and their parents. I now have to rely on my voice to be the way to share my emotion.

I know it will be a long time before I can be at work without a mask. How long? Who knows.

My mask won’t show if I am smiling or frowning. But my eyes….

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