Birthdays- such happy occasions.
Unless you can’t celebrate them.
On May 28 Nolan turned 21.
It should have been a huge day to celebrate.
But instead I had my usual very hard days of heavy grief before what would have been a special one as Nolan’s mom.
I am too tired to write in my own words what I am thinking and feeling this week – so instead I will have others say it for me.
Do not tell me I am strong
You only see my days
Filled with details and work
You have never shared my nights
Long evenings empty
Except for memories and tears
My despair is sacrificed
You would be strong too
If you had no other choice
— Kim Knapp
We march on in time. I am thankful this big grief wave has to end sometime and I see some respite coming.